Friday, May 16, 2008
Groceries on the Edge
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Fairway
To avoid compulsive shopping, experts say, do not go to the grocery store on an empty stomach. So the most sensible thing to do upon arriving at the Fairway in Red Hook is to head straight for the cafe. There’s a small but well-stocked salad bar and a menu of sandwiches, including the Ba Da Bing which, loaded with prosciutto, salami, and provolone, is about as classic as an Italian sub gets. The best deal, though, is the hot dog platter. For $2.25, you can take your kosher dog, cole slaw, and chips to the seating area outside to eat before a glorious view of New York Harbor and the Statue of Liberty. Stomach now full, you can safely browse the expansive aisles, including the wing of the store that houses all-organic products. There are mile-high walls of fresh fruits and vegetables, an impressive cheese case, an olive oil tasting station, great meat and fish departments, and plenty of tempting prepared foods, hot and ready to take home for dinner. No promises that eating a hot dog beforehand will stave off impulse-buying because it certainly didn't work for me. But it was a darn good dog. |
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Thursday, May 15, 2008
Vertiginous Money-Depleting Thieves
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Dizzy's
I don’t know about you, but I like to spend money. Lots of it. I like to flip it out of my pockets and roll in it. I spend it on mediocre food. Ideally, in knick-knacky refurbished restaurants that want my enfeebled lifeblood spilled, unduly. While sitting around legions of artfully arranged interracial couples by Prospect Park. And that’s why I go to Dizzy’s, where a burger is $10 and the unpleasantness free! What’s wrong with you people? In addition to the fact that the waiters are laconic and gruff (and scruff) in a retired Scandinavian football player way and/or shrill, inattentive and harsh in a former hard-partying riot grrrl way. Pre-1998, this place was a coffeehouse. But don’t let the old Park Town sign fool you. Now, it’s a “finer diner.” |
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Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Jury Duty in Queens
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Queens Criminal Courthouse
Five tips for surviving jury duty as it is served at the Kew Gardens, Queens criminal courthouse: 1. "Appropriate court attire" just means "not naked." Wear something comfortable. 2. Though you can bring your own coffee and snacks, limiting yourself to a few Washingtons for the vending machines will give you a taste of the prison life you might condemn someone to later in the afternoon. 3. Bring a laptop. There's wifi in the waiting room, and you will be waiting. 4. Bring an iPod to drown out the sounds of several televisions playing The Rachael Ray Show. Turn it off later so you can learn from Judge Judy. 5. Don't miss the aesthetically challenged, politically incorrect public artwork known as "Civic Virtue." Nothing will make you happier emerging from the E/V train at 8:30 am than seeing a sculpture depicting a mighty man trampling on the bodies of semi-nude, presumably sinful women. |
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Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Thug Life
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Rubber Sole
Known for carrying tons of great "urban" t-shirts (featuring guns, girls, drugs and other sorts of playfully chauvinist fun), fantastic sneakers for skaters and casual street wearers alike and pairs of Chucks for fewer than 40 dollars--Rubber Sole is an excellent stop for looking sharp (so long as looking sharp involves wearing t-shirts stamped with gold leaves and wearing Canvas kicks) in the city. Among the other great things in this store are a series of "celebrities spotted at our store" photographs, one of which features Ice "Detective Fin Tutuola" T doing an amazing hand-clutch with one who is presumably a store worker. |
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Monday, May 12, 2008
Tunnel Tour
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Brooklyn Historic Railway Association
After a five year hiatus, Bob Diamond is resuming tours of the world's oldest subway tunnel that he discovered under Atlantic Avenue in Brooklyn. Now, I'm usually not one for tours, but this is one of those cool and literally underground things you can only do in NYC. Plus, you get a great history lesson of early New York and the opportunity to be amazed at how Diamond gets his impressive bulk down into the tunnel. The tour meets at the old Independence Bank building at the SW corner of Atlantic Avenue & Court Street, under the clock on random Sundays so check the website for tour dates. They say to show up early, but you'll have to still wait about 30 minutes to get into the tunnel so just try and get there on time and bring a cup of joe while you bide your time first on the sidewalk, then in the tunnel as you wait for everyone else to get down. The tunnel itself is HUGE and runs about a mile and a half, and Diamond spins a great yarn of its discovery and history as you walk the length of it. |
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